So Tuesday to Thursday isn't much time to pack. Although I did attempt to follow my moving project plan as much as possible, I didn't start the packing part until we knew we were officially moving. Two days to pack up your entire life (2.5 people + bloodhound + 2 chickens) is a bit stressful. On top of the sheer physical demands of packing and loading boxes, there was also the emotional stress of leaving my beloved city (even though I want to move to Austin to make my dreams happen). Matt and I tend to fight more when we're under stress, so we found ourselves arguing about packing (I thought we should stay up late packing every night; he wanted to go to bed and "just pack the boxes when we're loading the truck.") and fighting about asking for help (I wanted to throw a little party and invite lots of good friends to help carry boxes; Matt thinks it's rude to ask other people to help you move). We stayed up until 3:30am getting the truck packed (after the battery died and we had to unpack almost the entire truck to find our checkbook for the closing).
Our closing went smoothly, and the buyers are a delightful couple. We are so, so fortunate to have sold our house in this economy (and at a price significantly higher than we paid for it 3.5 years ago, thanks to the desirability of our neighborhood). After the closing, we trekked to Austin. Matt drove the truck, while I schleped the baby and the chickens (in a box) in my car. We arrived in Austin around 10pm and started unloading the truck.
And I have to say that our first week in Austin was hard. In some ways, it was awesome. I went to the grocery store on our first day here, and I ran into someone I know. The next day, I took Henry to his first birthday party. On Sunday I went to a cohousing potluck and met up with an awesome blog reader and her partner. On Monday, I met Kelly for lunch and a walk around the lake. On Tuesday, I met this cool lady at the park behind our house, and met a woman for dinner who is interested in Montessori For All. On Thursday I had a playdate with someone I met for the first time through a friend. On Friday we had a playdate with someone else and we hosted a dinner party.
But there was also the sinking realization that my life was better in Houston. I thought that Henry was going to start childcare right away, so I thought I would have time for work meetings. It turns out that the teacher isn't ready to take him yet, so I'm left feeling trapped. We moved here so I could start a school, but I don't have any time to get out into the community. I also thought that Matt would work from home, but he's been choosing to work out of the Austin office instead.
As I type all of this, I am overwhelmed with forgiveness. I want to say to myself, "Of course you are feeling this way! Look at all you've been through in such a short amount of time! Transitions are always hard. Things will look up soon."
But I'm also pushing myself to feel overwhelming gratitude for everything I have in my life. All the really important things are right here by my side.
And then I'm also generating next steps. I've connected with three different babysitters who will be able to give me the time that I need to meet with people in the community to talk about my idea for a school. It will be expensive, but it's what we have to do, so I can continue to be a patient and present mother when I'm with Henry. As I write that sentence, I worry that I'm going to regret my eagerness to go back to work when I'm old and gray. I don't want to think to myself, "Why was I in such a hurry? Henry was young for such a short time."
It's a delicate balance, for sure. I want to savor this time with Henry, prioritize family, and create space for connection, but I also want to feel like a complete, passionate person.
So, February, you are upon us. Let me go back and see how I did with my January goals (I'm afraid to look).
- Select at least three people for the Montessori For All Board of Directors. I selected two.
- Follow our project plan for getting our house ready for our move to Austin. I followed it for purging and organizing, which was good.
- Find a good rental house in Austin. Yes! It's right on a park.
- Get unpacked and settled in Austin fast. We're getting close. We already hosted a dinner party, so I'm feeling good.
- Read Strengths Based Leadership. Yep.
- Read Raising Cain: Protecting the Emotional Life of Boys. I borrowed the documentary from the library so Matt and I could watch it together.
- Help Henry build his iron supplies with a green smoothie every day (he's slightly anemic). Yes.
- Publish consistently on my two blogs. Nope. I couldn't keep up when we didn't have internet connection and we were busy, busy, busy.
- Finish my sections for the Montessori book I'm working on with Kylie. No! This project has been pushed to the back burner. Sorry, Kylie! Hopefully I will get to it this month.
- Participate daily in the Purposeful Conception e-course. Yep, I've been participating a lot.
- Read Love Medicine. I started it but it was too depressing for me.
- Run at least three times per week. I only ran two times this month. But I'm still really proud of myself because I didn't run for almost two years. When I picked it up again, I was able to run three miles without stopping.
- Do one sun salutation before bed every night. No. Now that our new house has carpet, this is going to be even easier. I'm realizing that I never responded to the yoga teacher's comment about picking a more relaxing posture. I hear you, but I love sun salutations! They stretch me out really well, and the breathing is so soothing to me.
- Send birthday cards. Big fail.
- Plan my birthday party. Tried to but the Portland idea got nixed.
Oh, February, you are a short month, and I'm already late getting to these goals. I need to be very careful with myself this month.
- Create a project plan for the year for Montessori For All
- Host Henry's first birthday party
- Get an Austin library card
- Change everything to our new address
- Do one sun salutation before bed every night
- Practice my mantra "let it go"
- Update our scrapbook
- Seek out joy in my new city